Come sooner

 I am done with winter.. Brrr.

 My dog, Rosie.

 Bring on the warmth of spring, and summer. I miss the sun.

I wish for blooming flowers, and that fresh spring smell.


I look forward to the late summer nights at the beach.


What are you missing,waiting, hoping for?

At my most recent OP appt, I was up a 1/2 pound. Not good enough. That beng said, It was suggested being admitted to my local hospital to be tube-fed. What?!  I am not even at my lowest weight, and they dont even consider going into treatment again, just bedrest/ tubefeed. Umm no thankyou. I know that would not be helpful  in my recovery. yes, I may regain weight faster, but mentally thoughts would be more conflicting, and how long do they think I can stand sitting in a hospital bed?

That idea is crazy in my opinion. So afer talking it over with the parentals I have been given one last chance to prove I can recover at home. So I’m given it my all. It is very hard, and I still get nervous about how many calories I must consume, but I keep telling myself, it Will be worth it in the end.

13 pounds till I’m in my weight range, wish me luck!

8 thoughts on “Come sooner

  1. Just hang in there and stay strong. Give it all you have and when you’re feeling down, remember that you’d really rather be healthy and not in a hospital. I unfortunately had to see my Mom cry when the doctors said my body was eating away at my heart when I was eating much worse than I am now in order for me to reall make a change. Don’t let it get to that, you deserve much better!! If you need someone to talk to or help you through it, I’m willing to listen! ^^

  2. It is soooo hard, but hey, 1/2 pound up is better than 1/2 pound down, right? When you look at your two choices, you can pick between either eating more or being tube-fed. You are right, it is incredibly scary sometimes, but in the end, it is worth every pound!
    I know you can do it! I’m thinking of you! 🙂

  3. You CAN do this my love. I am in a very similar position at the moment, we just have to remember how much better it is that the alternative. So stay strong, it will be worth it. Sending you lots of love xxxx

  4. Calories = energy. Energy = life.
    Eat up girl. Seriously. please don’t hold back, your anxiety has no power over you, your stronger than any thought, number, or set back, I can see it.

  5. Thanks for the comment on my blog 🙂 I’m so ready for spring, too!
    I know the weight gain can be soooooo hard, I recently found out that I gained about 3 lbs in 5 weeks and I was so mad! Just hang in there, it’s so much better to gain weight naturally than to have to be hospitalized. I know you can do it, girl!

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