reasons i want to gain weight…

If only there was a magic pill.

I have been in treatment a total of 5 times, every single on of those times I thought I wanted to gain the weight, and was motivated to get better. But really, I was just following the program and doing what seemed right. I didn’t really want it, I didn’t see how it would make my life any better. But now, I’m sick of it, I’m sick of being a twig who’s parents worry about them constantly, I’m sick of the thoughts, fears, and dumb rituals that have taken over my life. Yes, I still have my doubts and I know that gaining weight and beating ed will not make my life some happy miracle, but it’s got to be better than it is now. So, here are the reasons, I need want to gain weight.

To go to med school and become a doctor. I’ve wanted this for so long, I can’t let an eating disorder ruin my dream.

To have good, lasting friendships again. Ed does not compare to having real friends.

Exercise freely; I miss mountain biking, running, hiking, swimming, yoga, and dance

To get my period back so one day I can have beautiful children.

& fall in love with…

not ed.


Anyone else with me?  ❤

16 thoughts on “reasons i want to gain weight…

  1. I’m right beside you (besides the whole getting my period back thing) and I’m looking for a great recovery, which is why I’m trying to take it a little easier this summer and work out my problems. We can do this, there’s no doubt in my mind. ^^ Keep up the positive outlook, it’s contagious~

  2. love this post.

    i want to exercise again.

    I used to run race upon race. win medal upon medal.

    last 3 years i sit. i relapse into many afflictions. i feel arthritic and don’t even move anymore.

    u r so young. u must keep going.
    i’ve been in and out of hospital a lot too (its relieving to find u…someone who knows what that is like).

  3. I think these are great motivations for gaining weight. I never used to think that I could be happy at a healthy weight… I thought that I could only be happy if I was super twiggy, and that the more I gained, the less happy I’d become. But really, the opposite turned out to be true. Sure the whole gaining process was unpleasant and uncomfortable, but if you push through that and get to the end, I promise you that you WILL find more happiness. I’ve never been as happy as I am now, and I wouldn’t go back to what I had for anything.

  4. Thank you for this post, I needed to read it 🙂
    You are so right, for us there is nothing but benefits with gaining weight. By doing so we also get the opportunity to live, love and laugh.

    Again, thank you ❤ I have been reading your posts revently, and they are so beautiful. You inspire people, my friend. Be proud of yourself.

  5. What a beautiful post. It was just what I needed, I am in a place where I still struggle with the whole concept of gaining. I think it is hard to realise the real benefits until you write them all down. So you can totally do this!

  6. Wow I love this post.
    It is so inspiring to me. A lot of my reasons for commitment to getting healthy physically and mentally are the same as yours.

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